Shame and Grace: Healing the Shame We Don't Deserve

This is a very, very profound exploration of the role of shame and grace as they are played out and experienced in the Christian faith. While discussions of grace often remain stuck in the purely theological-doctrinal realm (ie, "God's undeserved kindness, forgiveness, etc shown to His own"), Smedes focuses on the application of grace--in the believer's personal life and in relationships with others. Throughout the book he provides example after example of graciousness. His explanation of the ro [...]

This book was hard for me to rate. I had never truly known the true concept of shame- it was always something I thought was the same as guilt-- but I learned how different they really are and how vital that difference is to the person who suffers shame-- from this book. I read this book at someone's suggestion, someone who knows my inner-most heart-- she was dead-on correct in naming the shame in my being! So from that perspective-- this book was a life saver for me-- I have a clearer understand [...]

Brilliant piece of work. If you deal with people, you need to read it. I know that sounds general, but there is no way to narrow down who this book it for. Our lives are messy and this helps us to check them. Other peoples loves are messy and this book will help us recognize what we are dealing with. More importantly Smedes provides a direction of action to move through a healing process. Get it and get your pencil and highlighter ready. You will be busy.

The concept of shame has been like light in the darkness. The author explains that shame is when we feel bad about who we are (as opposed to guilt, which is when we feel bad about what we do). He explores causes of shame (healthy and unhealthy) and how grace can heal us from it.

I like how Smedes writes. It is simple to understand but not simplistic. He hits a real vein of an under discussed topicame. He does not have a style to give platitudes, but writes from his own shamed place within which is where are the great writings reside.

Thought provoking and helpful.

This book really lacked depth and profound truth for me. I am someone who is very hard on myself and know what it feels like to be paralyzed by shame. I felt like he missed the boat on really capturing the death-grip shame can have on people and left me feeling like it was up to me to fix it (even though his thesis is that Grace comes from God). I felt his examples were often shallow and at times he made assumptions about people and their actions that I felt did not necessarily have to connect. [...]

"The point is that the grace of God comes to us in our scrambled spiritual disorder, our mangled inner mass, and accepts us with all our unsorted clutter, accepts us with all our potential for doing real evil and all our fascinating flaws that makes us such interesting people. He accepts us totally as the spiritual stew that we are.We are accepted in our most fantastic contradictions and our boring corruptions. Accepted with our roaring vices and our purring virtues. We are damaged masterpieces, [...]

For those struggling with that nagging voice in the back of their head, the one that says, "You'll never be good enough." The one that says, "You're a failure." The one that says, "Nobody will ever really love you." This books is a must read.For those who know somebody with those voices in the back of their head and long to help the one they care about discover joy, this book is a must read.In other words, for everyone, this is a must read.

Sometimes books can hit you about the head with truth, and demand that you change your life to fit the truth. This is not one of those books; instead it is a very gentle, gracious book. The author explains the gap between what we might feel and truth, and helps show God's loving path from one to the other. It also contains the best description of forgiveness, and how to achieve it that I have ever read.

This book was sent to me through a couple of people at a time when I was dealing with the concept of shame and the recognition of it. It was a God-send. Where others had dealt with the subject very effectively and I had already recognized it in my life, Smedes brings in the spiritual aspect without becoming preachy (that would have been a total turnoff for me). The idea that no matter what I've done, there is forgiveness and that some shame is actually healthy were points I needed reinforced.

Have never seen nor read a book that focused this directly on the subject of shame. It is easy to read and thorough in providing examples and viewpoints as to when people experience shame, including cultural and parental expectations. Found the section on "grace" to have a healing tone to it and overall it has a comforting feel to it.

Vier sterren voor de kwaliteit van het boek: Prima, maar soms wat rommelig. Je moet af en toe een beetje tussen de regels doorlezen.Een extra ster voor het thema dat hij uitwerkt. Ik had eigenlijk nog nooit over het begrip schaamte nagedacht, maar nu achteraf heel blij dat ik het heb gelezen.Update 2e keer lezen: vond 'em nog beter dan de eerste keer.

It was a 3 for me, but I see so much of value in what he said (so I'll add the star). I'm aware had I encountered these words in the past (or may need encounter them anew in the future), it would have been transformational.

Another great book worth readingoutlines a great framework of shame and grace leaving the reader with a solid base of new learning in regards to the topic at handAME.

Somewhat devotional in nature but the concepts for healing and mental health are rich. Highly recommend this easy read.

A great book that I think everyone who's struggled with understanding either shame or grace should read. Welp, that includes basically everyone on the planet. So read!

I read this about 6 years ago and it still remains one of the best books I have read.

really great stuff in here!!

Very good book- I will read again!! So many good things to take away. Explains unhealthy shame and how grace is designed to replace that shame.